Travis' Trails: November 2012

Las Vegas is one of my favorite destinations, not just in the winter, of all time! Where else is the party 24-7, year round?

When I found out that Norm & Jules were going in early November I started packing immediately! Then Norm told me the really BAD news.

Big Bill & Me

Since Big Bill still needed 24 hour care someone had to stay home and tend to him.

Norm said considering that Big Bill was part of MY entourage, not Norm's, I was elected to be the stay home person. I instantly demanded a recount of the ballots. I found out that like national elections, actual ballots don't really matter. There is something called an election school or electoral college that accepts donations and then they decide who wins. I didn't know, so I didn't donate. They didn't pick me to go, I was stuck!

Joni however saved me! She told Norm she would stay at the pink house and take care of the dogs and Big Bill and that I could go. I LOVE YOU JONI!!!

Vegas here I come! I could barely contain my happiness!

Airport to check-in was just under 5 hours. Instead of going directly to the strip we decided this trip to spend more time downtown.

Brenda at Golden Nugget

To those not so well travelled, downtown is where Fremont Street is. The strip, that everyone thinks is Vegas, was actually built on the edge of town. Locals get real testy if you refer to the strip as downtown.

This is Brenda, she checked us in at the Golden Nugget. Brenda immediately recognized my worldly good looks and was clearly smitten. She gave us a fantastic room. I would have slipped her my number but Norm still won't pay for me to have a cell phone.

I felt like a king! The bed was SO comfy and huge too! It was almost as big as a football field.

This is the kind of luxury that most folks don't expect to find in the Fremont Street hotel/casinos. You should check it out for yourself! It was great.

After we checked in it was time to fire up the party. This is a glass that Norm got on Fremont Street at a place called Mermaids. He said that they fill them with tasty frozen beverages, in different flavors.

Sounds like I know where we are going first!

On the way out we went by the pool. I am NOT going swimming! Hello.... Sharks have TEETH, they BITE!!

What kind of a crazy person wants to swim with sharks? Anyone? The tank is part of the pool, or the pool is part of the tank! There is a little piece of plastic that keeps the people and sharks in different areas. Plastic! Just plastic!

There is actually a slide tube that goes through the center of the tank. Chuckleheads will go down the slide and go zipping past the sharks! I'm no expert but I think taunting a shark by "swimming" past it real fast is like teasing a dog with a steak. Eventually he is going to try and catch it.

Norm said he wanted to go swimming and go down the tube. I think he was just being a big shot saying he wanted to go. He knew the pool was closed for the evening. Had the pool been open I think he would have been real quiet about going swimming.

Marsha at Mermaids

Ah, Mermaids. Tasty beverages!

Norm & Jules weren't sure if we could get "refills" or not. This is Marsha. She hadn't seen the round bottomed glasses like we had in a while. Jules & Norm got theirs 7 years ago.

Marsha was not only kind enough to refill them for us, she even made them all swirly and stuff just for fun! Strawberry - Banana, tasty, tasty, tasty!

One is all it takes too! Woo whoo!

After we got our tasty beverages it was time to try our luck at the casino.

Jules is a big fan of the Jackpot Party. It is based on the singing group The Village People and they sing and dance to the song Macho Man when you hit the bonus round.

Jules really likes the bonus part and always picks the sailor and the police officer, since Norm was a sailor and a cop. I really don't know how to compete with that. Maybe The Village People can do a comeback tour and have a gnome in the group?! I can see it now, Macho, Macho, Gnome, who wants to be a macho gnome?

Not only does Las Vegas have great buffets it has pretty good snack food too. I got all munchy and we got a couple of "Chicago" style hot dogs.

This is Margret not only did she serve us the best hot dogs that she had,

she also KISSED me!!

It turned out that Margret loves gnomes and of course with my way with the ladies, she couldn't control herself and stole a smooch.

If you ever go to Vegas one thing that you HAVE to do is be on Fremont Street at night to have the "experience" of the whole sky lit up and the music. It is called the Fremont Street Experience for that reason. It is nearly impossible to describe or explain. It is awesome! The show changes regularly too so if you did see it before, try it again! I planned on posting some video of me dancing with the lit up sky and the music, you know to entice others to go see it, like free advertising. Then I was informed I can't put that on here without paying a royalty for the song. It was a great tune, but not THAT good. So all you get is this picture. Sorry.

OK, back to the slots. I did REAL well on this machine. One thing I learned too while I was in Vegas this time is that you can win on slot machines.

They give you all kinds of money. They also hypnotise you into giving back all of the money they gave you and a whole bunch more of your money too! There is something about the lights, bells and tunes that lull you into emptying your pockets. But is sure is fun!

Howdy girls! Great picture!

Being a huge celebrity has advantages and sometimes takes up some of your time. Now and then I have to stop and have my picture taken with adoring fans.

Hi guys! Thanks for the photo!

I don't understand other celebrities that get mad or try and charge their fans a dollar for a picture. I guess some celebrities get so full of themselves (or something else) that they fail to realize that without their fans they would just be another tourist in the crowd. I always make sure to thank MY fans and I always turn off my electronic devices like the pilot says.

After enjoying ourselves immensely on Fremont Street it was time to get some well deserved rest.

I know, party 24-7 and sleep when you are dead. Well, the theory is great, reality is different, especially at my age.

Besides I wanted to enjoy the luxury of our room a little. A real spa experience, right in your room. Awesome!

More site seeing along Fremont Street and just stopping to actually look and see what else is in Las Vegas besides the strip and the casinos. Not much...but maybe I wasn't looking real hard.

Back to having fun!

This is Sergio. We met him on the strip. He is a real nice guy. Unfortunately, Sergio has fallen in with some questionable associates. They are all salespeople!!

They say that they are going to give you $400 to play in the slot machines and $100 worth of food, just to listen to a sales pitch. When you have 5 days in Vegas, sitting still for 60-90 minutes to get $500 worth of free stuff is easy, right? FORGETABOUTIT!!!

I told Norm not to do it, but NOOOO, he had his eyes all set on getting $400 to play the slots. What a chucklehead.

Simply put we wasted a LOT of time. A piece of advice, wave as you walk past and say "No thanks." Look that gift horse in the mouth and you will see it needs a LOT of dental work!

After escaping Sergio's associates and using up our "free" slot money in less than 5 minutes on their "restrictions apply" machines we decided it was best to get back our good mood and good karma so we checked into our next hotel, The Flamingo!!

Checking in with Damon

I really love the Flamingo. It is one of the last original strip casinos. Most have been torn down and replaced. The Flamingo has expanded considerably from when it first was built, but it retains the mystery, magic and allure of the old days of Vegas. You know, crooked noses, the rat-pack, shady backroom deals, visiting "families" that nobody saw.

Damon is who checked us in. Damon is from Hawaii originally and he is very astute. (I know some 25 cent words, don't be so surprised.) He sensed that we were a bit out of sorts considering

what we had just endured with Sergio's associates. Damon set us up in a great part of the hotel, the 27th floor and made it a point to vastly improve our mood regardless of what room we got. The room was just icing on the cake! Thanks Damon!!

This was the view from our room, looking down toward the pool area.

What an awesome room! Big fuzzy blankets! I know, its pink, but what can I say? It is the Flamingo!

There was a picture in the room that all of us wanted to take home. It would look good in so many different places.

Maybe in my more youthful days I would have toyed with the idea of planning a heist and making off with it. But that wouldn't be the right thing to do and it being hot would have destroyed the beauty of the shot. Besides, karma is not to be messed with! Do you see any of those crooked nosed guys in Vegas anymore? Nope, bad karma is why.

After checking in we decided to wander further away from our hotel than our legs were up for and see some other locations. In Vegas you can walk for miles if you want.

OR you can take a bus...

There are all sorts of ways to travel in Vegas. They have cabs too but I have heard they sometimes take the long way around.

But being in Vegas isn't about transportation. Its about tasty beverages and fun.

This is Leigh Ann she made sure we had tasty beverages as soon as we got off the bus and into a casino.

Great service makes Vegas so much more pleasant, even if your tasty beverage is coffee or soda pop.

Site seeing in Vegas is pretty cool, especially when you are with a beautiful woman! This was outside the Excalibur Casino. I think Las Vegas is like Disneyland for adults.

People watching is a great past time too. It never ceases to amaze me how a seemingly intelligent person can get so stupid just because they drank some alcohol. Moderation people! It makes the Vegas experience much more memorable. A little drunk is ok, you should save ignorant drunk for at home.

Eating New York pizza in Vegas is completely normal. Weird, but normal.

You can never be sure what you will encounter in Las Vegas. Who in their right mind would have an alligator as a pet? OK, maybe having one as a pet is acceptable. But put a cage around it or a sign letting folks know that it is lurking around! Had Norm not jumped, triggering my catlike reflexes, this lunging critter would have grabbed me for a snack! Instead it got a whack on the nose. (I nearly wet my pants when this beast jumped out at me! Norm was still laughing 3 hours later. I don't like alligators. The whack on the nose was more me pushing off and trying to get away!)

Someone posted this fountain on FB recently and was asking if anyone knew where it was. I didn't find Waldo, but I knew exactly where to look.

I think the pink flamingos were a hint though...

The strawberry daiquiri was my idea as a salute to pink.

There are so many beautiful things to see. Slowing down a little and looking around is the best way to enjoy what the designers have done in Vegas.
Having clear vision in the morning helps too. In many ways it really is just like a Disney park.

For all of our vintage camper friends out there, we hit the mother lode!! Flamingos are everywhere! Even pink Christmas trees!

I mentioned earlier stopping to have a picture taken with a fan and not charging them for it. These ladies were looking for work and figured getting a picture with a star like me would help their careers. It is always good for showgirls to be photographed with celebrities. Although it was a business photo for them, I didn't charge for posing. I hope they get the job.

This is Shirley. She was welcoming people as they entered one of the casinos. Shirley had some sort of a hook-up and was offering everyone free show tickets. No football games, just shows at the casino. She wasn't even scalping the price either.

Shirley was nice and offered to take our picture together. Most of our vacation pictures don't have all of us in them. Thanks Shirley!

Venice is wonderful at this time of year. Especially when its inside a building in Vegas!

Yes, this is INSIDE. Not only is it beautiful but to make sure it feels like outside the sky changes from day to night too!

Of course it wouldn't be proper without a few marble statues here and there.

I went to get my picture by this one statue and Norm was helping me up onto the railing. Of course Norm being a smartalec said "no sticky fingers" as he was putting me up there. How insulting!

Then the statue reached down and grabbed me! I swear my heart jumped a beat or two when that happened!

After the picture with the embarrassment of the sticky finger comment I blew up! I kicked Norm in the shin and told him to leave a few bucks on the railing. He said he wasn't going to but I told Jules and she made sure he did. It is getting harder and harder to go anywhere with him.

Right after aggravating me he goes and does something nice. We posed for this picture and Norm said he would buy the shirts and we should try to live up to the sayings on them. Of course we couldn't agree on who would be awesome drunk and who would be officially drunk so we didn't get the shirts. But we did get another tasty beverage in an attempt to settle the debate.

After a few more tasty beverages I told Norm I saw Bigfoot. He said I was crazy. When I pointed to the spot that I saw him in Norm said I should look a bit harder. It turned out that I didn't see Bigfoot, it was just a Mirage....

Vegas has a lot of street entertainers that do different things for a dollar or two. These guys said they arrived a few weeks ago for a buddy's wedding. They lost all their money shooting craps (I hope I can say that) and had to resort to posing for pictures with tourists to get bus fare home. I couldn't believe anyone would actually pay to shoot craps, but I guess to each their own. They must have been real bad shots anyhow. I don't think they hit one craps. Luckily they didn't have a spot on them anywhere.

Two of my favorite TV shows from the 60's have been made into slot machines.

As a youngster I would sit in front of the TV for hours watching these shows. Now I can sit in front of them in Vegas giving them lots of money to entertain me. Jeannie's voice saying "Hello, Master" and Herman's slamming the table saying "I'm rich, I'm rich" after a jackpot are fantastic memories. If I could find a place to buy a Munsters slot machine for at home I'd buy it!

Playing slots can be exhausting. Especially in Las Vegas. It is a desert you know. It was a good thing that Kristin found me and brought more tasty beverages. I might have died of thirst had it not been for her. Hi Kristin! Tell everyone I said hello.

Check this out! A lakefront gnome house! I wanted to go visit but I couldn't find a staircase anywhere. I tossed a couple of rocks at the door since I couldn't reach the knocker and they didn't have a ringer button. Have you ever tried to find rocks in Vegas? I think someone hides them so the crazies don't toss them at doors trying to knock.

I wonder if my real estate agent could get me a look inside?

I understand supporting one's team, but where ever Norm goes wearing his Bears shirts it starts something, usually with a Packer fan.

Hello, chuckleheads. Its a game, that YOU DON'T PLAY, millionaires do!

Do you know how silly you look getting all uppity saying how great your team is? Nobody cares, especially Norm. Reality check... Championships are won in Chicago usually once in a lifetime. The exception was the Bulls. As for the Bears, Norm was in fact around in 1985 so he is toast for seeing it happen again. He knows that. So lighten up.

I don't remember where this was or what the name of the game was but I liked the noise it made when a forty cent bet turned into over $20! Of course I gave most of it back, I didn't want anyone to think I was ungrateful. Besides, it was fun!

This is Ketrice. We met her at the Tropicana. She was in charge of giving away the casino's money. All you had to do was to register and if you lost you got your money back. You know, like insurance. It was great.

Ketrice wasn't too sure about getting her picture taken with me though. I just make some people more nervous than others.

I just wish that my luck of winning her over would have transferred to the games at the Tropicana. At least I got my money back.

You know, Las Vegas is about taking risks, right? A little adventure now and again keeps the blood pumping. Well, this was our hotel for the last two days.

This is Ricardo. He was the person that checked us in at the Imperial Palace. Needless to say the Imperial Palace is undergoing some changes. Its reputation among Vegas locals has been struggling as of late. Norm was extremely nervous about staying there but the sense of adventure had taken Jules to new heights when she was making reservations. That and the whopper of a deal that the IP had presented.

So we stayed there our last two nights. Ricardo put Norm's worries to rest almost immediately. He gave us a great room and then said to go check it out. If we didn't like it in any way let him know and he would change it for us. He also made sure that our room was "more in the middle" of the building because of all of the construction. He couldn't guarantee that we wouldn't hear any of it, but said it should be very little if any.

This was our room. Very clean and spacious. A bit dated, but who wants a big screen TV?

The view was wonderful (at night). You could even go out on the balcony! A first for us in Vegas.

The one thing Norm & Jules always say is that you don't go to Vegas to spend time in your room. I agree, but what little time that you DO spend in your room, it is best spent in a good room! All of our accommodations were wonderful this trip.

I have to attribute some of that to the great people that checked us in at all three establishments. They went out of their way to make sure we felt like we were being treated special. Do I believe for a minute that we were treated differently than everyone else? No, I don't, but I like to think that my being a famous world traveller might have helped. (At least in my mind I'm famous and they made me feel special!)

We went to Paris for breakfast one morning. Well, actually it was brunch because while we were eating breakfast they changed the buffet over to lunch.

So we got both breakfast and lunch in one sitting! Its a good thing I wear stretchy pants!

A lot of people say things are bigger in Texas. I have to wonder about that.

You can easily make some ginormous mistakes in Las Vegas. I think this eraser is a way of reminding folks how big the mistakes can get.

Ok, so it seems we ate for an entire day. Well, we did. I think this was my favorite place! It was at Planet Hollywood. It had all sorts of foods from different parts of the world. But one section was heaven! All desserts here!